Monster-In-Law

As you know, my husband and I are living with his parents while we wait for our house closing.  I assure you that I am counting each day until the second we move out.  Granted, I love his mom to pieces.  (Odd that I would love my Mother-in-Law, right?  As I thought that was supposed to be the mortal enemy of a daughter-in-law)

My Father-in-Law annoys me, frustrates me, and angers me until my blood feels like its boiling.  He is charming and funny when he wants to be, which isn't the majority of the time.
He is irritable and on edge at all times.  He barks at his family over the smallest things.  He has caused his wife and sons to walk around him on eggshells, and I hate him for it.
He is extremely lazy when it comes to spending any time with his family.  He wakes up at 3-4 am and goes to bed each night after dinner (Tonight he went into his bedroom and shut the door at 6pm).  He doesn't speak to anyone when he comes home, sits in his LazyBoy, watches TV, and plays games on his computer.  He expects his wife to serve him dinner in his LazyBoy.  He won't get up and join the family at the table, except on Sundays.

Instances:
*My husband hurt his leg while doing outside landscaping work for his father (because his Dad is too lazy to do it).  My husband was getting ice to put on a large bruise.  His father YELLED at him for "Taking All The Ice".  (He was angry because he wanted enough ice for his Bacardi and Cokes that he drinks)

*My husband and I were doing the outside landscaping work.  His Dad wanted to haul it away.  We reluctantly bagged it up to put it in the back of our NEW SUV because his Dad didn't want to put the bags in HIS car.  Then his Dad proceeded to slam my SUV trunk REPEATEDLY because it wouldn't shut (something was obviously in the way).  My husband yelled at him to stop slamming the trunk.  His Dad's comment was, "You always tore up my car when you were younger", and he proceeded to try slamming the trunk closed.  I finally yelled at him, "PLEASE STOP DOING THAT TO MY CAR.  I WOULDN'T DO THAT TO YOURS!"  Finally, he quit.  He never did apologize.  He filled my SUV up with a full tank of gas instead.  It irked me that #1 He didn't respect his son's property enough, #2 Didn't respect his son's wishes, #3 He thinks its okay to treat someone else's stuff poorly because isn't a luxury model like his.  He is rude and selfish.

*I pulled a cup out of the kitchen cabinets to get a drink.  A plastic cup accidentally fell out and hit the kitchen floor.  His Dad immediately yelled from his LazyBoy, "WHAT WAS THAT?"  Wow... a cup... chill out...it was an accident.  It causes his family to walk on eggshells around him.

*He complained to my husband that I was doing "too many loads of laundry".  Therefore, I've adjusted my laundry schedule.  I do laundry when he isn't home, so he doesn't see how much laundry I do.  I still do the same amount, but now he can't complain about it.

*He complained to my husband I left laundry in the washer too long.  The washer timer went off while he was there, and I was running an errand.  I was going to switch the laundry when I got back.  Once again, another reason to do laundry when he isn't home.

*He complained to my husband that I put food containers in the recycling bin.  FINE!  I won't recycle.

*He complained that I filled up the recycling (inside) bin, and I should have emptied it into the big bin in the garage.  Guess what Sherlock... if you see it full, how about you get up off of your lazy, fat ass and empty it yourself?

*I left the garage door open because I knew he would be home soon.  He scolded my husband that I left the garage door open.  Okay, I'll leave it shut for you.

*He complained our dog peed on their carpet....over two years ago when she stayed here during our engagement trip.  She isn't even staying here right now because he won't let her.  Therefore, why the heck is he STILL complaining about her?!  Not to mention, it's a DOG... it was an ACCIDENT!  I keep wondering aloud (in front of my husband and mother-in-law) how he will react when we have children and they accidentally spit-up on the carpet...spill milk...drop food on the floor...play loudly.  If he yells at them for doing NORMAL children things I will NOT have him TERRORIZE them the way he has done his wife and sons.  They have completely adapted their lives to accommodate his selfish, lazy, and super controlling way of life.  It is completely unacceptable.  I wouldn't tolerate it if I was married to him.  I told my husband flat out, "If you act like that when you're older you can bet that I won't deal with it.  I'll divorce you".

*My husband purchased wood and made a sideboard/hutch for a Coffee Bar in our new home, which I'll have to take a photo of later because it's awesome!  His Dad complained about the sawdust it created in the garage, even though my husband cleaned it out afterwards.  His Dad didn't even comment on the good work my husband was doing...his only comment was, "You'd better clean all that shit up!"  Really?  Do you think your son is 10 years old still?  Do you think he needs to be reminded at almost 30 years old to clean up after himself?  What an ignorant ass.

*His wife has to brush her teeth downstairs at the kitchen sink before bed.  She isn't allowed to brush her teeth in the master bathroom because it will wake him up, and he will yell at her.  She goes to bed at 9:30 pm, like a normal person.

*These are only a FEW examples of instances while we have been staying here the past month and a half.

The longer we are here, the more irritable my husband gets.  I can tell he is boiling over.  He told me yesterday, "I can't wait to move out of here, so I don't have to deal with him.  I can't wait to not see him for a long time"  How terrible that your children think that about you. . .
I wish I could vent about it to my husband, but obviously nobody appreciates their spouse talking poorly about parent.  However, he knows how I feel.  I agree with him when he says something, but I try to keep my more "colorful" statements about his Dad to myself.

His wife says its because he's stressed at work and brings it home.  It's an excuse that I don't accept.